Be honest (if not with anyone else) with yourself. You KNOW you are in a miserable relationship. You KNOW that you are being mistreated and unappreciated. You KNOW how unhealthy it is for you to stay, emotionally, mentally and perhaps physically. What you believe is that you have put time, great effort and love into this union and walking away leaves you with nothing. You are being plagued by F.O.M.O, the Fear Of Missing Out. You hold on believing your mate will take all the love you have poured into them, which will eventually make them a terrific person, for somebody else! Ugh! The thought of you doing all of this hard work, struggling to make them honest, loving and a great catch will not be yours to enjoy. He will walk away and be the best person for her. She will grow a heart, see the error of her ways and be the best girlfriend to him. This is simply something you cannot allow to happen!
“What about me,” you say? What about all that I gave in this relationship? What about all the love and care that will ultimately make him a better man? What of the plastic surgery I paid for that now has her looking like a bombshell that someone else will enjoy? How is any of what I put in that they will share with the next person going to benefit me if I leave? Let’s ask a better question: how much of the you that put in the hard work only to gain no love in return will be lost forever if you stay?
The truth of the matter is that people make a choice to love you. They make that choice in spite of you because it’s their choice to make. So whether you put in 90% of the work and they could barely muster the 10% you received in return, they chose that 10% as your value. And you continuing to stay in this chaos to eventually get back a love that takes your breath away may NEVER happen. The only thing you know for sure is that as each day goes by, more of your value is diminished. The tears seem like a fountain that won’t end and you are beginning to dread the days you wake up in the morning. Is this “love affair” you are anticipating in misery worth it?
Let them go! Yes, let them go to the new person. Whether they leave as a better person, the same person or a worse person matters not! Let them walk away. And as they walk, you walk, too. But walk away knowing that you deserve a love that makes you want to get up and enjoy every day you have left in this life. Walk away convinced that you deserve to live free of not feeling like you are not enough. YOU ARE ENOUGH (for someone who makes the choice to love you).
By the way…you know all that love you have given so freely, honestly and with expectation of having in return? You can take all of that to the next deserving person and finally get to know what a mutually satisfying relationship feels like. Leave that empty relationship and F.O.M.O. behind. Look forward to a future with a person that makes the choice to give you what you give in return.