In every area of life, there is a beginning and an end of things. A new relationship, an eight-pound baby, a bouncy puppy or putting your keys in a new home, new beginnings offer promise and hope. Newness is a “desired acquire” for humanity, marking a new season and things to look forward to for a long time to come. But seasons being what they are, they change, shift and ultimately end.
Let’s talk specifically about relationships. When you are in a healthy partnership, your “firsts” are not just exciting and joyful, they are also informative. The proverbial “first look” prior to the wedding ceremony tells you that sharing with one another the gift of their presence is sacred and an “for us only” moment. The first time you make love informs you on how deeply open and intimate your partner wants to be with you and only you. Your first disagreement exposes you to how well you take care of each other’s hearts or if the choice is to win by wounding. Again, all these “firsts” are a “tell” of what you share as a couple and the priority that you make of the love you are building with your partner.
What message has your union been expressing lately? Can you say that it has not been as important to master the assignment of what you promised to one another? Does being in their presence hold the same space of joy and love as it once did for you? Relationships are tough and they need extra care, time and attention. If you find yourselves in a season where that has not been the standard or precedence, it is time to return to good love.
Relationship and sex therapy will forever be a boon to enhancing a healthy relationship. If you have the expectation that your struggle can be managed without outside help, ask yourself, “What are we actually doing to make this better?” The urgency is in what you truly prioritize, and if your efforts have fallen short, despite the love being solid, get some help. Reach out to Helping Others Heal to renew your intimacy and connection.
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