My partner and I are having problems. How can you help?
As a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist (LMFT), my specialty is working with people who are having relationship difficulties. LMFT’s are trained from the perspective of seeing people from a “systems” mindset. Simply put, we look at how people work together in relation to others around them and how they impact you and the system you are in with your partner. I love to approach relationships with the attachment theory in mind. My training as an Emotionally Focused Therapist (EFT) is valuable because it cements my true feelings about all of us in our humanity: we need connection. We need to be loved. We need to be understood. We want someone to believe that we are special to them. Helping clients get to a willingness to be open to the vulnerability of love is what I thoroughly enjoy.
Do LMFT’s only work with couples?
Although the title LMFT implies only working with marriages and families, we work with individuals as well. Each of us is a part of a system. Whether that is your family of origin with parents, siblings and grandparents, or in the community of others at work, we all interact with others and those interactions can bring challenges.
Why did you choose Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)?
What I appreciate about EFT is that the first goal is to assess what is going on in the partnership and de-escalate from the emotional difficulties/negative loops. The belief that people need to feel in order to make changes is powerful. Oftentimes, emotions are discounted or not encouraged but they are a telltale sign of each person’s needs and struggles. We attempt to regulate rough emotions by bolstering empathy, building a caring and collaborative bond and supporting vulnerability for attachment and care.
How long will this process take?
EFT is a relatively short therapeutic intervention. Typically, it takes between 8 to 20 sessions for couples and individuals to walk through the stages of EFT.
